21 November 10 - 15:19Sage

Last night, was out with my friend listening to live music. She gave my mentee, 14, her phone to play games on. Torn between watching a woman play guitar and pondering my age, being single, once again a home-owner, and being in a doctorate program, I felt an extreme loss of the gentle, loving nature of a daughter, the one who called me mom for 5 years and was swept out of my life for reasons unknown to me to this very day At the same time, I remember the challenges, and the headaches, but most of all I remember teaching her to read, do math, solve problems, see things a different way, sweep the simple stuff under the rug and understand the world from a perspective only I had for her that made sense to both of us once in a while--we clicked well, and I love her and miss her.

One can't "replace" one kid with another, and I know what I"m doing with my mentee is all good and everything, and we have a great time; I also see her growing into a young woman very quickly. ... (more)

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20 November 10 - 10:27Love the House

This morning my cats woke me up at 5:15. It's Saturday. This is a day to sleep in, as if I don't already sleep enough. However, last night I was out late (approximately 10:30, leaving my bedtime at 11:30 pm). This translates into a virtual disaster. What did I do? What's a girl TO do? Build a fire of course. I built a fire in my living room wood burning stove and went to bed after I was sure it was stoked, plenty of wood, a hot bed of embers etc. These are things fire experts know. Then I shut the door to the stove, assuring the fire would not consume my home.

My duh-scovery. The thermostat is in the living room. My bedroom is upstairs. It's 70 degrees downstairs around the stove, and 59 degrees upstairs. The positive outlook: I ordered a mattress pad heater. This does not save on heating bills. It will spike an electric bill. This is the complety incomprehensible dilemma I am facing this morning. One might be pondering the question, "what are you doing about it? ... (more)

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